Once more we gather, we growing band of Fervent Friday Fictioneers, drawn together by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. Each Wednesday she posts a photo prompt to tempt us, this week the photo is courtesy of Janet Green. Join us as we try to write a very short story – 100 words, or a poem – same rules apply.
An eternity I was lost at sea in search of your love
Never finding shore nor
seeing one on the horizon
Lost in the vast emptiness that was
everywhere
Your ocean of love eventually giving me life
Binding us
together as husband and wife
(extract from “Sea of Love” – by Bill Turner)
Genre: Romantic fiction
Word Count: 100
Footprints in the Sand
Wandering by the shore, her slender feet leave footprints in the damp, pale sand. The returning tide bubbles into rockpools and swirls over pebbles, she wonders how long it will be until all signs of her are washed away.
Her green dress billows softly on the breeze; a thin strap falls onto a freckled arm, resting there unnoticed as she stares out at the ocean. Reluctantly, she turns back to their rented holiday villa. Has the grey cloud of suspicion and resentment followed them to this tranquil little paradise? Seeing the expression on his face, she rather thinks it has.
(This is an extract from a short story I wrote about marriage; how it can go wrong, what it takes to get it back on track)
40again's Blog 
I’m guessing she may have had “one more for the road” before getting married
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Thanks for reading Alistair.
By way of explanation, the couple who have been married for a long time, have ended up in a relationship that is floundering. The piece here shows them having just arrived for a ‘make or break’ holiday, but it gets more complicated.
I did wonder whether it would stand alone.
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Ahh I see 🙂
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A nice snippet that shows there is trouble coming!
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Thanks Joe, they certainly have lots to sort out!
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Dee, the contrast between the peaceful setting and the suspicion is stark. I had to really concentrate, though, as that flying dragon was distracting me today. 🙂
janet
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Thank you Janet.
Not too sure about the reference to the dragon though?
Dee
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On the right side of your site, “The Year of the Water Dragon”, with the flapping wings. 🙂
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Goodness, when I look at my site it’s static. What a distraction it must be.
Dee
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Sounds like they are doomed… paradise never really helps.
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Well they have their moments!
Thank you for reading
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Nicely worded Dee, weaving the romantic moment into a very sad (and short?) future. And I love the picturesque capture of her walk along the beach. Well done!
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Thank you Penny
They have a lot to resolve, I appreciate your kind words, thank you for reading
Dee
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an interesting read the TV show Revenge hit my head as soon as I read this. I have never the show but the lead actress was this woman you wrote of…I’m not sure it that’s a compliment or not Dee, but you took me there. 🙂
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I’ve not heard of the TV show you mention…I’m taking your comment as a compliment and sending grateful thanks 🙂
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A change of environment does little to soothe their feelings. Also like the natural descriptions in this story
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True, they still have lots of ‘stuff’ to sort out
Thank you for reading
Dee
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You really captured a sad, thoughtful mood here. Nice descriptions here, of the tide bubbles and her freckled arm. These made it easy for me to imagine the scene.
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That’s a really nice compliment, thank you so much.
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Love the imagery and the detailed description. I had a crisp picture in my mind.
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Thank you very much.
Glad you liked it
Dee
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Life is too short.
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I can’t argue with that statement.
Thanks for reading
Dee
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Yeah the water dragon seemed like he was trying to get my attention too, flapping away in the periphery of my vision. I really liked the story though. The very writing itself, the word choices used, seemed to reflect the character and made me want to read further.
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Dragon sorted!
Thank you for reading and for your kind comments.
Dee
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Dear Dee,
I felt that this snippet of your short story does stand alone. Sharp contrast between the peaceful setting and marital turmoil. You left me wanting more in a good way.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle
Thank you.
So pleased you thought it did stand alone, I was worried that it hadn’t worked.
Have a good weekend
Dee
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Enjoyable and rather poetic.
Scott
Mine: http://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2013/04/18/friday-fictioneers-4192013-genre-sci-fi-pg/
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Thank you Scott, pleased that you liked it
Dee
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I’m thinking she has a secret…. secrets = trouble.
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Biil
There are secrets aplenty in the full story
Thank you for reading
Enjoy your weekend
Dee
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There’s a wealth of atmospheric detail in this, beautifully observed. That strap falling down the thin arm, the dress. Excellent!
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Thank you Sandra, much appreciated.
I was worried that it wouldn’t work, but had to take the chance.
Have a good weekend
Dee
🙂
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Beautiful writing. I could picture her by the sea. Really lovely 🙂
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Thank you Elf, much appreciated.
So pleased that you liked it
Have an enjoyable weekend
Dee 🙂
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Elegantly told, atmospheric piece.
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Why thank you elephant, you’re very kind
Much appreciated
Dee
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I think that’s a beautiful little story and I like the narrator’s voice ‘…she rather thinks it has’.
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Thank you for reading Trudy, I’m glad you liked it
Dee
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At first I thought she was contemplating suicide via drowning…but instead I see she is drowning in sadness … wondering how to sort out their marital problems. Perhaps they should take a brief hiatus from each other..via separate vacations. Nice work.
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Thank you Lora for your very perceptive comments. They have a lot of work to do if they are to rebuild their life together.
Lovely to hear from you, as always.
Dee
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Your descriptions are really vivid, Dee. And you definitely capture the reader’s interest. I didn’t feel they were doomed — as evidently several others did. What I actually felt most powerfully was the mystery — mystery surrounding their purpose for being there and the various possible outcomes.
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Thank you Sandra. Your comments are so appreciated, this couple have a lot to resolve. Like a lot of couples they have let small resentments grow into huge obstacles rather than deal with them as they arose.
Lovely to hear from you
Dee
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I love the look of your site.
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Sandra you may be psychic – I was looking at other themes on WordPress only yesterday, as I thought mine look a bit boring compared to some of the others. Perhaps I’ll keep it after all
Thank you
Dee
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Well, this present site looks and feels comfortable, yet it has enough going on — especially with the pictures used in your sidebar — that it captures attention in various places and keeps the reader moving through it. I also like the layout of the header. Now, that being said, I can tell you that I am a person who likes change in my own life — that is if I’m in control of that change — and I have changed my theme a number of times — as well as changing photos and background color a few times in between. I do it mainly because I enjoy doing it, though, and I’ve never been sorry for a change — except once — but it was easily fixed by going back to the theme I had previously. If you enjoy experimenting with graphic layouts, you might enjoy trying out new themes, etc., but I wouldn’t feel pressured to do so because your site is very welcoming and easily navigated, and definitely not boring.
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Thank you for taking the time to come back. I think I’ll leave it as it is, for now, and keep experimenting with other themes just to see what the blog would look like.
Your blog has a lovely comfortable clean feel to it and the header photograph is just stunning.
Nice to find you here.
Dee
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Nice description. I like the little details you put in that make the scene come alive.
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Thank you David 🙂
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wonderful descriptions.. great transition from romantic to sad… perhaps they’re doomed, perhaps there’s still hope. ^^ it’s great in such a way that it makes readers wanna know more
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Thank you kz, your comments are always appreciated
Dee 🙂
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That was excellent Dee, so descriptive in such a short space and yet it felt complete. Very good. 🙂
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Thank you, glad you liked it
Dee
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A melancholy piece. I really enjoyed the details of the sand, the strap falling, the green dress–all the little details that painted a picture in my mind’s eye.
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Thanks Russell, lots of editing getting the details right … but then you know that too.
Dee
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