Footprints in the Sand

/ Dee

Once more we gather, we growing band of Fervent Friday Fictioneers, drawn together by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields. Each Wednesday she posts a photo prompt to tempt us, this week the photo is courtesy of Janet Green. Join us as we try to write a very short story – 100 words, or a poem – same rules apply.

An eternity I was lost at sea in search of your love
Never finding shore nor
seeing one on the horizon
Lost in the vast emptiness that was
everywhere
Your ocean of love eventually giving me life
Binding us
together as husband and wife

(extract from “Sea of Love” – by Bill Turner)

 

wasp-nest

Genre: Romantic fiction

Word Count: 100

Footprints in the Sand

Wandering by the shore, her slender feet leave footprints in the damp, pale sand. The returning tide bubbles into rockpools and swirls over pebbles, she wonders how long it will be until all signs of her are washed away.

Her green dress billows softly on the breeze; a thin strap falls onto a freckled arm, resting there unnoticed as she stares out at the ocean. Reluctantly, she turns back to their rented holiday villa. Has the grey cloud of suspicion and resentment followed them to this tranquil little paradise? Seeing the expression on his face, she rather thinks it has.

(This is an extract from a short story I wrote about marriage; how it  can go wrong, what it takes to get it back on track)

 

55 thoughts on “Footprints in the Sand”

    • Thanks for reading Alistair.
      By way of explanation, the couple who have been married for a long time, have ended up in a relationship that is floundering. The piece here shows them having just arrived for a ‘make or break’ holiday, but it gets more complicated.
      I did wonder whether it would stand alone.

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  6. an interesting read the TV show Revenge hit my head as soon as I read this. I have never the show but the lead actress was this woman you wrote of…I’m not sure it that’s a compliment or not Dee, but you took me there. 🙂

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  11. Yeah the water dragon seemed like he was trying to get my attention too, flapping away in the periphery of my vision. I really liked the story though. The very writing itself, the word choices used, seemed to reflect the character and made me want to read further.

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  12. Dear Dee,
    I felt that this snippet of your short story does stand alone. Sharp contrast between the peaceful setting and marital turmoil. You left me wanting more in a good way.
    Shalom,
    Rochelle

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  19. At first I thought she was contemplating suicide via drowning…but instead I see she is drowning in sadness … wondering how to sort out their marital problems. Perhaps they should take a brief hiatus from each other..via separate vacations. Nice work.

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  20. Your descriptions are really vivid, Dee. And you definitely capture the reader’s interest. I didn’t feel they were doomed — as evidently several others did. What I actually felt most powerfully was the mystery — mystery surrounding their purpose for being there and the various possible outcomes.

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    • Thank you Sandra. Your comments are so appreciated, this couple have a lot to resolve. Like a lot of couples they have let small resentments grow into huge obstacles rather than deal with them as they arose.
      Lovely to hear from you
      Dee

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    • Sandra you may be psychic – I was looking at other themes on WordPress only yesterday, as I thought mine look a bit boring compared to some of the others. Perhaps I’ll keep it after all
      Thank you
      Dee

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      • Well, this present site looks and feels comfortable, yet it has enough going on — especially with the pictures used in your sidebar — that it captures attention in various places and keeps the reader moving through it. I also like the layout of the header. Now, that being said, I can tell you that I am a person who likes change in my own life — that is if I’m in control of that change — and I have changed my theme a number of times — as well as changing photos and background color a few times in between. I do it mainly because I enjoy doing it, though, and I’ve never been sorry for a change — except once — but it was easily fixed by going back to the theme I had previously. If you enjoy experimenting with graphic layouts, you might enjoy trying out new themes, etc., but I wouldn’t feel pressured to do so because your site is very welcoming and easily navigated, and definitely not boring.

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      • Thank you for taking the time to come back. I think I’ll leave it as it is, for now, and keep experimenting with other themes just to see what the blog would look like.
        Your blog has a lovely comfortable clean feel to it and the header photograph is just stunning.
        Nice to find you here.
        Dee

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  23. wonderful descriptions.. great transition from romantic to sad… perhaps they’re doomed, perhaps there’s still hope. ^^ it’s great in such a way that it makes readers wanna know more

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