Making a Scene

/ Dee

Greek mythology has always been of great interest, I love the way the stories that have been handed down through the generations, are part myth, part magic and part history. The photo this week, courtesy of Al Forbes was always going to inspire one Greek tragedy or another.  I decided to take a slightly different view, but I think I have managed to get some of the attributes of Hermes into my effort this week.  So, a fanfare for the goddess of Friday Fictioneers Rochelle Wisoff-Fields, as she summons us all once more to the podium.

Courtesy of Al Forbes

Courtesy of Al Forbes

Fleeing the Scene

Genre: Fiction

Word Count: 100

Waking from a deep sleep I stretch feline-like

And then relax into the deep comforting mattress

Unbidden the memory returns.

The words cut deep, wounding us both,

Hateful bile spilled out of our mouths as we paced the room,

I cursed you for taking my love and trampling it underfoot,

For cheating and betraying me.

You grabbed my arms and roughly twisted one behind me

Trying to force me down onto the floor,

I felt excitement first then fury, that sheer strength could overcome me

Where words had failed

Shaken by your intentions you ran, fleeing the scene

And me

 

 

I’ve just found out that this is my 200th post and I have to admit I’m rather chuffed to have got this far.

46 thoughts on “Making a Scene”

  3. Congratulations on having 200 posts! WOULD that I could do it like you, but writing is sort of a necessary hobby of mine. Anyway, I like the poetic way the story is told and what’s happening . Truly good!

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    • Yes they certainly can…
      I’ll have to look more closely at Haiku, I’ve never been really sure what it is, being perfectly honest.
      Thanks for reading
      Dee

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    • Hi Sandra, thank you.

      I started my blog in a half hearted fashion, not really sure what I was doing or what I wanted to achieve.

      I have to say I have thoroughly enjoyed the experience so far and met a lot of lovely people. I think my writing has improved and being part of FF has played a great part in that.

      Dee

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  9. I was terrified that he did something worse-but so glad he had the sense to leave!Human relationships specially involving the matters gf heart are so complex-a great read:-)

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  10. Dear Dee,

    Intense scene. You had me there in the moment. I’m still breathing hard. I will have to say that the bile coming from their mouths conjured up a very different image until I read the following line.

    Mazel tov on the 200 milestone. I have a way t go before I catch you and then you’ll be pushing 300.

    Shalom.

    Rochelle

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    • Dear Rochelle

      I got quite carried away with this one and wrote loads, which meant lots of editing to get it to fit the challenge.
      I’m pleased that you liked it, something different for me.

      That’s the first time I have seen mazel tov written down, I’ve heard it lots of times, what is the correct meaning?

      When I started my blog I was very nervous and kept it private for a while (lack of confidence I think at the time) then took the plunge and have really enjoyed the journey.

      Take care

      Dee

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      • Dear Dee,

        Actually, my last two have been departures for me in some respects. Glad you challenged yourself. It worked. I used to wonder what people meant about the process being more exciting than the destination. Now I understand.

        Mazel Tov… means something like “Good fortune” and is commonly used as Congratulations.

        Shalom,

        Rochelle

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      • Dear Rochelle

        I haven’t seen your most recent one yet, will be visiting later. I just love the way you manage to weave history into your stories – I know it’s one of your passions – but it gives them all extra substance.

        It is good to leave your comfort zone occasionally and walk a different road.

        Thank you for the explanation – lovely words.

        Take care

        Dee

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  11. Dear Dee,

    This poem was a smooth and powerful, somber and reflective piece of work that still is resonating in my mind. Something deep and powerful stirred within me as I read it and I want you to know that this one will linger in my memory for a long, long time.

    Aloha,

    Doug

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    • Dear Doug

      I thank you for your very kind comments, they mean a great deal. I am a huge fan of your writing and am pleased to think you have found something to appreciate in mine.

      Take care

      Dee

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    • Thank you Jan, and for reading.
      Until recently I gave poetry a wide berth, but have enjoyed writing a few pieces, in this style – not too good at rhyming poetry

      Dee

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    • Hi Ron

      Thank you.

      WordPress flagged it up I really couldn’t have said how many I had done, the time has gone quickly. I only wish I had learned how to set up
      all the widgets when I started out.

      I’m pleased you liked this effort.

      Take care

      Dee

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  19. An intense work, and I was particularly taken by this line: “I felt excitement first then fury, that sheer strength could overcome me” This piece was very good throughout.

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