Genre: Fiction
Word Count: 100
Home at Last
The ties that bound me were severed so long ago, I have forgotten why. The cold seeps into my bones, forming a brittle frost. The gnawing emptiness in my stomach would signal hunger to a brain able to care or respond.
The light surprises me, it’s intense and blinding. A flashlight means police and an order to ‘move on, get out of here.’ But this light is too strong and never wavers. As a whisper of summer fills my nostrils and glides sweetly over my tongue, I think I am smiling.
I am held tight.
I am home, at last.
and read more stories…
My thanks to Doug MacIlroy for the photo prompt that sent chills this week and to Rochelle for continuing to lead the Friday Fictioneers whilst getting her novel edited and now ready for publication, many congratulations. You can read more below and on her website
‘Beginning on April 20 Please Say Kaddish For Me will be available to preorder from Kindle in ebook form and to preorder from http://www.a-argusbooks.com/GalleryComing.htm in print form. Release date scheduled for May 8′.
Love some of the phrases in here. Not sure what it’s about, but it sounds good. See you next week!
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Thanks Paul didn’t mean it to be obscure. It’s about a street person succumbing to cold and hunger and loneliness. A bit grim but there’s where the photo took me. Thanks for reading.
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Nice work, Dee!
MG
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Thank you. A bit grim this week, thank you for reading 😊
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The final moments of a street-person? Very sad Dee, but nicely written.
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Yes, quite right. I saw a programme about street people in Swansea and how, despite various groups trying to help, nothing changed. It was sad but seemed in the main to be their choice and I kept wondering why and what happens to them. Thanks for reading.
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I get the image of the little match girl playing with that light.. still true in that final moment..
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Thank you Björn. The photo sent chills and the scene unfolded. Thanks for reading.
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Really sad. Not sure that it’s their choice – I suspect mental illness accounts for most of their aberrant behaviour. Thank heaven summer is not that far away.
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Thanks Patrick.
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I loved the rhythm of this.
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Thank you Dawn.
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Seems like a vote for charity.
Good piece.
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Thanks Mick
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So sad, the emptiness and despair of the protagonist is tangible. I guess it’s the light at the end of the tunnel. The last moments speak of better days in the past.
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Thank you for your kind comments Gah, much appreciated.
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So sad, but at the same time you can appreciate the relief.
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Thank you Lore, not sure why the photo made me feel so sad, but there we are.
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Wow! … a sad tale of escape and freedom. At last. Beautifully written.
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Thank you for your lovely comments Caerlynn, pleased you liked my sad tale this week.
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The final bit of warmth before the end… Very effective and very sad.
The little match girl remembered indeed – think that was the first story I truly wept over. ( And I’ve been as involved in fiction as real-life ever since!)
PS I like your bluebells at the top – are they out now again?
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Hi Miranda, thanks for reading and pleased you liked it. The bluebells are indeed blooming again, they seem to take over the top of the garden!
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A sad ending or maybe not. He’ll never be homeless again.
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Thank you Joseph
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Great, Dee! Just terrific! That ending gobsmacked me right between the eyes. Potent stuff.
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Good to hear from you Kent and so pleased you like the story. Hope you’re keeping well 🙂
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Dear Dee.
I’ll admit to having to go back and read a second time after reading your explanation. No matter, I enjoyed it. I, too, thought of the Little Match Girl. Nicely done.
And thank you for posting my publisher’s link. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle
Sorry if I was tad obscure this week, I knew what I wanted to say… hopefully the second read got you there. So pleased you book will be out soon, will be ordering my copy. 🙂
Take care
Dee
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The best stories are those that need more than one read, in my view. Yours was wonderful – you balanced the tragedy with the narrator’s feelings of comfort and relief at being home at last.
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Thank you Margaret for your very kind comments, I am thrilled at your response.
Dee
😀
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Took me a few reads to get my weary brain into gear, but I’m glad I did because I realised it was a great story!
Rosey Pinkerton
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Thank you Rosey, your lovely comments are really appreciated 🙂
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Dear Dee, You really set a sad tone here. Very good and amazingly strong! You are really good at this Dee. I read it three times. Just awesome! Nan
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Dear Nan, thank you, thank you, thank you. Your comments mean so much 🙂
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Sad story that ended with the person coming to their final “home.” Lovely, Dee. 🙂 — Suzanne
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Thank you Suzanne, it was a sad one from me this week, hoping for something brighter this week. – Dee 🙂
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Dee, this one is so rich in imagery and emotion! Really powerful!!
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Thanks Dawn, a bit grim for me but I enjoyed writing it .
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This was excellent – I understood exactly what you were aiming for first read. It’s well written and whilst a sad start the end feels almost positive or uplifting.
Nice work.
Kt
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Thanks KT, I really appreciate your comments, thank you for reading. Dee
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