Thanks as always to Rochelle for her sterling work and thanks to The Reclining Gentleman for the photo this week.
Genre: Fiction
Word Count: 100
A Bridge Trip
Jerry limped into the bar on North Street and hauled himself onto a stool.
‘You got money this time Jerry?’
‘Not ‘xactly.’
‘You know the rules, NO credit.’
Lowering his voice Jerry leant in, ‘Ben, listen, there’s a hole in the pavement on Murray Bridge. No sign. Nothing. I sorta tripped and hurt myself. A guy helped me and said I’ll get comperation, that’s cash aint it?’’
He wiped a grubby hand across his mouth, watching Ben pour a beer for a paying customer.
Ben laughed, then pushed a beer towards him, ‘Jerry, you’re unbelievable. Get a job, it’s safer.’
You know, I kind of warmed to both of them. 🙂 Great take on the prompt.
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Thanks Sandra 😀
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Ha.. there is money in stumbling in pot-holes.. wonder if he got a pint before, it could reduce the “comperation”
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I’m sure he must have. Thanks Björn
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There are few as impoverished as an alcoholic.
Good piece.
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Unfortunately, yes. Thanks Mick
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Nicely done, Dee. Made me laugh.
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Then I’m pleased I went with humour this week Loré. 😀
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Cute story! I really enjoyed it.
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Thanks Joy
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Funny and sad. Well done.
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Thank you, pleased you liked it.
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I love Jerry. You should try to use him as a recurring character in other future stories. He’s great. And, of course, Ben is such an easy touch! 🙂
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Great character description of Jerry.
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Thank you, glad you liked him
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I have to say, Dee, for such a sweet-looking lady, you are pretty clued up on deadbeats and bars!
Love the story.
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Haha…I like that! You know what they about appearances … not that I’ve hung out in many bars you understand. Thank you CE you made my day 😀
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What a likeable pair of characters. I’m glad Jerry got his free beer. Nice story.
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Thank you Margaret, Jerry tries hard … 😀
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Hey, sometimes a person’s gotta do what a person’s gotta do. 🙂 What a story! Love it!
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Thank you Caerlynn great to hear from you and that you liked it 😀
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An old softie is what he is, that Ben. Loved the dialogue.
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Yes he is. Pleased you liked it Dale 😀
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These two characters bounce off each other really well. I agree with funny and sad – a winning combination in a story.
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Thank you, glad you liked it MJL 😀
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I loved the dialogue, brill 🙂
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Thank you Helen, it’s always nice to hear from you 😀
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Nice story. Loved the dialogue. Jerry is nothing but a drunken sheister and Ben a soft touch but both are nicely likeable.
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They are likeable really, there’s a great back story for the guy I called ‘Jerry’ perhaps I’ll get around to writing about him one day. Thanks for your comment Irene 😀
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If you do I’d like to read it Dee.
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Totally believable dialogue!
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Thank you Liz, that means a lot 😀
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Get a job, why, free beer for a great story. Nothing better!
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Let’s hope he doesn’t run out of stories … Thanks for commenting Yolanda 😀
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Great Story Dee! I liked the dialogue! 🙂
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Thank you! Pleased you liked it 😀
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I suspect our desperate friend gets more drinks from his tall tales than from hard currency. The dialogue here is well done, you get a sense of both characters, and their history in just a few short sentences. 🙂
KT
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Thank you KT, I really appreciate your comments 😀
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I’d make Jerry sign a waiver before I’d let him walk into my bar, just to be on the safe side (for him and me).. 😉
Randy
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Great idea Randy … Thanks for reading 😀
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Great character development in such a short space, Dee. I sense a lot of compassion on Ben’s part. Very well done.
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Thank you Amy, I feel Ben has had lots of practise 😀
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Humorous, but sad.
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Thank you Dawn 😀
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I like them both, they’re great characters, and reading your story makes me feel like sitting in that bar and watching them.
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What a lovely comment, thank you so much 😀
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thanks for the smile…a lovely warmth here too….
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Thank you for reading 😀
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